Its been two weeks since my life and my whole families lives were completely rocked by the shootings in Newtown. I can't quite believe it has only been two weeks. It feels like so much longer, but I am no closer to understanding or to feeling like some change has been enacted to prevent this. I know that both of those things are a long way off if they are even possible.
I've never been one to care much about the New Year, but this year I think I do. 2012 was tough year in so many ways. There are some definite challenges on the horizon in 2013, but I am looking forward to turning the page on this year and getting a fresh start no matter how illusory that start is.
One good thing I can take away from this year is what I have learned about myself. I have a new sense of myself and what I can handle as well as what is really important to me. I think adversity can bring better self-awareness and I'm grateful for that small thing. I know it will help me immediately and hopefully well into the future.
A quick update on my family...
My nephew and niece are doing OK. There is still a lot to deal with for both of them, but I think they are looking forward to starting their new school next week. I am sure there is some trepidation for them, but I believe they crave the normal routine. I hope it will be helpful more than scary. We spent Christmas Eve with them and it was such a treat to see them running around and smiling -- eating candy and playing with new toys as elementary school kids should be doing. My brother and sister-in-law are hanging in there. I worry about them as they've had so much to deal with in these last two weeks and the end of the worry will probably never come for them. Their lives are just as changed as their children's. All of us are in awe of our remarkable luck that we still have my nephew with us and that this time hasn't been the nightmare of our imaginings.