The holidays combined with the end of the year are just kicking my butt this year. Everything feels extra-intense -- the highs and the lows. Makes me kind of want to dive under the duvet until January 4th or so. Am I the only one feeling like this?
Zoe has certainly built up Christmas this year. She was very upset when we were decorating the tree because we didn't hang every ornament we own. She was afraid Santa would be disappointed. She is pushing on the Santa thing extra hard this year because I am afraid she is starting to question the whole thing. It breaks my heart a little. I want it to be extra special magic for her just a little longer.
The family stuff can be rough too. Its not too bad this year, but every little bump in the road gets magnified when Christmas or Hanukkah or New Year's is attached to it. I decided a few years ago that I wanted the holidays (including Thanksgiving) to be fun for me too and not just about familial obligation. Ultimately that has been good, but it does cause some tension. How can it not?
Work is insanity and I don't even want to talk about that. I just want a few days off to forget it. Hopefully I'll be able to put it mostly out of my mind. I will say that as rough a road as work has been this entire last year or more, I am ever more grateful for the wonderful people I work closely with. I have made a few very close friends that certainly make every day better. Some of them are far and farther flung, but it is no matter.
I hope for everyone that they can find something fun or special or just relaxing about this holiday season. I wish everyone all the best in 2010.
Coming soon...new year's resolutions...