The girl who cried stomach ache

I am sure I am going to suffer horrible guilt if it turns out that there is something truly wrong with her, but it seems like lately Zoe has a lot of convenient, phantom stomach aches. Here's a typical scenario:

It is 8:15 AM and Zoë is supposed to be getting dressed but instead she is just sitting on the potty.

Me: Zoë! Hurry up!
Zoë: (silence)
Me: Zoë! What are you doing?
Zoë: But Mommy, I have a stomach ache.
Me: Since when?
Zoë: It hurts.

You can change the time of day or where she's sitting, but this usually occurs when we're trying to get out the door to go somewhere or when she is on the verge of getting into trouble. I bought these children's Pepto Bismols and sometimes I give her one just so we can get a move on.

Does that make me a bad mother? I mean, a single children's Pepto tablet seems harmless enough. The dosage is two tablets.

And I almost always have really good instincts for when Zoe is truly sick and this just isn't ringing true with me. The stomach aches are just too conveniently timed. She is a smart girl, but she just doesn't know when a certain trick has worn thin.

Guilty Pleasures

Tagged again by Becky.

1. Six guilty pleasures no one would suspect you of having:

• Eating ice cream in bed. I don't know if no one would suspect that of me, but it isn't something I've broadcast. When I've had a bad day I like to eat a bowl of ice cream while in my PJs and tucked into bed.
  
• Buying cosmetics and other bath and body type products. A few close friends wouldn't be surprised, but I don't think anyone really knows how much I enjoy buying a new lipstick or lotion or other promising potion.
• 60's folkish/anti-war music. I can't explain it really, but I was exposed to it when quite young. Think Cat Stevens (pre-Buddhist), Crosby, Stills, & Nash, Neil Young, etc.
  
• Neil Diamond. I know I am not alone here, but I don't generally advertise the fact that I know all the words to "Cracklin' Rosie." Again, I blame it on my parents. (And yes, I heard that "Sweet Caroline" was written for Caroline Kennedy.)
• Rob Lowe. He's just so darn good looking. I have seen every movie and TV show he's ever graced. He was so good in West Wing and so foolish to leave. Even with that whole underage girl in the hotel stuff, I can't help it.
  
• Expensive haircuts. Again my close friends already know, but I like to get good, expensive haircuts in NYC. My salon of choice is currently Arrojo Studio. You may recognize the name from Nick Arrojo of "What Not to Wear" fame -- it is one and the same. Although, I am not indulgent (or rich) enough to have Nick cut my hair, but I would love that.
  

2. Six guilty pleasures you wish you had the courage to indulge:
This is a hard one so I'm changing it to include things I'd also like to be able to afford or have time for.

• Personal trainer.
• Personal chef.
• Custom made bras.
• Going back to school.
• Drawing.
  
• Broadway shows. I love musicals and plays. I wish I could find the time and money to see many more. Right now I only get to about 1 or 2 a year.
  

3. Six pleasures you once considered guilty but have now made peace with:

• Candy. I used to think I was the only person who liked candy, but then one day I realized that most grocery stores and CVS stores have entire aisles devoted to candy so I really can't be the only one buying the stuff.
• Chick lit. I used to hide 'em, but now I freely admit to loving them. They are like the candy of the book world.
• Lattes. I used to think it was utterly absurd not to mention completely wasteful to pay over $3 for what is essentially a cup of coffee with milk, but it is such good coffee. A good latte can make all the difference in the day.
  
• Gadgets. Electronic gadgets, that is. I am an early adopter and have been since before the phrase was coined. I don't regret my 2 mega-pixel camera, my RocketBook or my Handspring module that played about 23 MP3s. I could probably open a gadget museum. I love them and since it seems that Apple has made the gadget cool, I am proud to show mine off.
• Shoes. Yes, I buy a lot of shoes, but at least it is a better habit than gambling.
• Buying more books -- I mean lots of books. I have shelves of unread books and I enjoy knowing they are there waiting for me.
  

Manic Monday Meme

Which personality trait has gotten you into the most trouble?
My big mouth. Sometimes I just don't know when to shut up. It's not that I spill the secrets, but I just run off at the mouth and it makes me look silly.

If you had to gain 10 pounds what would you eat to gain the weight?
Milk shakes. When I was little a friend of mine was really, really skinny and he had to have a milkshake everyday to help him gain some weight. I remember being very jealous of that.

How is your private self different from your public self?
I'm quieter in my private life and not really so friendly and outgoing.

Thanks Manic Monday for another good set of questions.

Playdates

Rob and I took Zoë to the playground this afternoon and by chance our neighbors were there too. While the kids were playing we got to talking about what it used to be like when we were kids and we could just go out and play. I can only remember being taken to an official play ground a handful of times. We didn't need to do that because our parents could just let us out the door and tell us to be home by dark. Nothing new in that I know, but it did get me thinking about these new-fangled "playdates" that never really existed when I was a kid.

Before this year a playdate meant a get together for me as well as for the Zoe and her friend. Sometimes this was fun and sometimes this was the opposite of fun. There's only so much coffee, chit chat and "kids, share with each other" I can stand.

This year a change has come to the playdate. Now that Zoë has reached the golden age of 5, drop off playdates are acceptable. I don't know who sets the age standards, but apparently 5 is the age. Drop off playdates are a good thing. Obviously when Zoë gets dropped off that means a few hours of time for me while she is having fun, but when Zoe has a friend over, that equates to a few hours of mostly quiet time at home for me. I can get things done around the house or just relax. On Friday while Zoë had a friend over I did 5 loads of laundry, balanced the check book, did some online Christmas shopping and watched a little TV. I made the girls lunch at one point and had to tell them to stop running around a couple of times, but other than that it was quite nice. I should also point out that Zoë had a fabulous time. She was quite sad when her friend was leaving and she can't wait until she can come again.

I am decidedly pro-playdates.

Manic Monday

I just discovered a new site called Manic Monday.

Today's question are:

What is your least favorite day of the week and why?

What's the best way to end the day?

Which animal would you have left out of the ark?

My Answers:

Tuesday. It's got nothing going for it. It isn't Monday, it isn't hump day, it isn't the end of the week. All you have to look forward to on a Tuesday is most of the week ahead of you. (Unless you're on vacation, of course. Then Tuesday is a good day.)

Good dinner, good wine, warm bed.

Skunks. Sorry Pepe LePu and family, but that stink is the worst.

Same time next year

2006

2007

Can't wait to see next year's snapshot...

"Me" Meme

I've been tagged again! (Thanks Becky)

This is a fun one, here are the instructions:

List one fact, word or tidbit that is somehow relevant to your life for each letter of your first or middle name. You can theme it to your blog or make it general. Then tag one person for each letter of your name.

M -- Mom
I know it is an obvious one, but being a Mom is a big part of my life. (In case you hadn't noticed from the blog.) I never really dreamed of being a Mom when I was a little girl. I didn't give it much thought one way or another and sometimes I even thought I wouldn't have kids, but sometime shortly after Rob and I were together we both new we'd have a baby. I'm not much for the paranormal, but it was as if having Zoe was something we couldn't stop or control. We were both suddenly consumed with the idea of having a baby. We both knew our baby would be a girl and from very early on we knew what her name would be. I can't even imagine life without Zoë in it.

A -- Artist
I think at some point in my life I considered myself an artist and I'd really like to get back to that feeling some day. The life of a true artist by profession is not an easy one and when I gave up on it I also gave up on the entire artistic side of me and I miss it a lot. I've started trying out photography for something new and at some point I'd like to take a class or two. I'd like to get back to that writing I dabble at too and then maybe someday put the two together into photo-essay books. Or maybe I'll just go back to drawing.

R -- Reading
I love reading and I love books. I wish I had more time than I do for reading and I am insanely jealous of the people I know who can read really fast, but at the same time I do enjoy savoring a really good book. The other part of reading that I love is book shopping. Book stores are wonderful places where amazing, life changing discoveries can be made and these days you can even get a good cup of coffee to go along with. I read to Zoë every day and I take Zoe to the book store a lot and hope that I can pass along both my love of reading and my love of book stores.

C -- Candy
Anyone who knows me knows how much I love candy. Note that I don't mean chocolate. Chocolate is good and has its place in the world, but my heart really belongs to candy -- like Mike & Ike's and Good 'N Plenty and Nerds and Blow-Pops and Smarties and ...I've loved candy for as long as I can remember. When my brother and I were little every Saturday was "Candy day" and my Dad would take us to the store -- Bob's Kit and Kaboodle and we were allowed to pick out 2 pieces of candy each. That was definitely my favorite day and if my dream of opening a candy store were to ever come true, I might just have to call it Marcy's Kit and Kaboodle.
(If any dentists are reading this -- yes, I do brush my teeth 2 or 3 times a day.)

Y -- Yes, I Can
OK, I know that is a stretch for the Y word, but Y is a tough one. Yes, I can is the attitude I am trying hard to adopt. Yes, I can find a job that where I both succeed and am happy. Yes, I can have a career I enjoy and still be a good mother. Yes, I can have a good, stable marriage. Yes, I can be happy.

Boycotting the NY Times

I just realized I have been boycotting the NY Times. I haven't even looked at it since last Thursday's outrage -- if you don't count the Sunday magazine. I guess that it is enough punishment for both of us.

Are unconscious boycotts effective?

I'm no editor

And certainly I am not a NY Times editor, but I think something got mixed up today.

When I open NYTimes.com the first thing I usually check out is the 10 Most Popular Emailed articles and the current number one (as of 1:18 PM today) is The Feminine Critique. I was intrigued by the title so I clicked on the link, read the article and nodded along with it. For an experienced working woman, there is nothing new in this article, but it is interesting to read about the scientific studies. No surprise there that women still do not get equal treatment in the work place.

I was about to email the article to a colleague with whom I have had similar discussions, when I noticed what section the article appears -- Fashion & Style.

Really? Doesn't this belong in the Business section? By placing this article here below articles on organic cosmetics and and art/fashion performance, it seems to me the NY Times is perpetuating the very inequality discussed in this article. Come on, guys.

Happy Halloween, argh!

I can fix it!

On Sunday we took possession of a practically new couch that my father was giving away. He's just moved house and decided to get all new couches. As these things often are, the couch moving was awkward, although not as awkward as the time we moved into our first apartment and had to bring most of the furniture including the couch in through a window. That explains why we left most of our furniture when we moved to the house.

I digress.

As the couch was being awkwardly moved into the house, one of the feet got knocked off. Once we got the couch in place Rob tipped the couch on its back to see if he could get the foot back on. He tried to jam it on, but then declared he would need tools as it was a screw situation. All of a sudden Zoë tore off and up the stairs. An instant later I knew exactly where she had gone.

"Where did she go?" my Dad asked.

"Wait a sec an you'll see," I said already smiling.

Feet thundering down the hall, she re-appeared tool box in hand. "I can fix it!" she declared. "I have tools!" She knelt down next to Rob, popped open her orange Home Depot tool box and said, "Do you need a phillips head or a flat head?"

I just love that kid!

Halloween Strategery

The other night Zoë asked me if she and her two cousins could eat dinner after trick-or-treating on Halloween night this year. Traditionally the cousins come over with their parents (my brother and sister-in-law) and we all have dinner together before hitting the streets trolling for candy. Her argument was that it would be better for her younger cousins to go out earlier and then there would be plenty of time for dinner and they could still get to bed on time.

"Do you think I was born yesterday?" I asked her.

My brother is convinced she will grow up to be a lawyer or politician -- maybe both.

This needs no further comment...

http://site.despair.com/blog/2007/10/11/new-despairwear-your-blog/

Education complete

The other day Zoë brought home a drawing that said "I want to learn...to cross the monkey bars in kindergarten." The drawing is quite an effective representation of her actually swinging monkey-like on the playground bars rendered carefully in crayon. On Saturday, while we were away visiting friends, she managed to do exactly that -- she crossed the monkey bars. In fact, she did it so many times that I am not sure how she was able to lift her arms the next day.

Tonight I asked her, "Now that you have accomplished crossing the monkey bars, what do you want to learn in kindergarten next?"

"What does accomplish mean?" she asked.

"It means now that you have learned to do it. What do you want to learn now?"

"Nothing!"

I guess I don't need to worry about saving for college after all.

Guy Smiley, is that you?

Is it just me, or does Jake Gyllenhaal...



remind you of Guy Smiley...?

While driving

I really thought I had seen everything people could do while driving from kissing to putting on make-up to, of course, talking on the cell phone. However, today I saw something I never saw before.

I was stuck behind this Saab that was driving erratically -- slowing down and speeding up with no rhyme or reason. Finally I was able to pass this car and when we came to a traffic light and I was stopped next to the car I looked over to see who was driving this car fully expecting to find someone talking on their phone. Instead, I saw the man in the driver's seat was eating corn on the cob.

Seriously, corn on the cob. While driving.

I don't understand that at all.

Eeyore is sleeping

Last night my husband put Zoë to bed and as he was tucking her into her cozy bed filled with stuffed animals of a wide variety Zoë suddenly realized her beloved was missing. Her beloved is Eeyore, of course. She has had this same Eeyore since she was 6 months old and he is her one true lovey.

With panic rising in her voice she said, "Where's Eeyore?"

"He's downstairs sleeping on the couch," my husband replied calmly.

"When he wakes up, can you bring him upstairs?"

The End of Summer

Summer seems to want to linger this year and I am not at all sorry. Each extra day of warmth and sunshine is like a gift and I don't even mind that my lawn has turned mostly brown from lack of rain. And even though some lovely new fall clothes hang patiently in my closet, I have been making an effort to keep wearing my light weight skirts, sandals and summery t-shirts. I want to take advantage of every day where no coat, scarf, or gloves are needed.

I just read a really great poem here, which has inspired me to put one of my own poems here...

The water like a slate
and the insects have all come
to share their secrets.

Listen closely.
It's a long way from home,
but little is asked of you.

They collect their toll in drops,
and stings,
leaving behind only a
permanent stain.
The dragonfly floats and stares
and delivers the summation.

Watch and don't turn away.
Just remember.

The butterflies already know,
their golden flash is the only thing
briefer.

Momsense!

I wish I had stolen this sign...