Wordplay

Just got back from seeing the movie, "Wordplay." Whether or not you like crossword puzzles, this is a good movie. When it was over, I wanted to watch it all over again. If you've ever attempted a crossword puzzle, you will be impressed by the abilities of some of these people and there is no doubt that Will Shortz is enthusiastic about his job.

The only drawback in my mind was the fact that they didn't even mention Eugene T. Maleska, the editor of the NY Times puzzle from 1977 to 1993. There must be some bad blood between Will Shortz and him, but even so, I think it was unfair to not even mention him.

A Walk to the Dairy Queen

Nothing says summer like walking to Dairy Queen after dinner. We did that last night and it was so much fun. It felt like we were on vacation. Zoë shared chocolate ice cream with rainbow sprinkles with her entire body. I think she even managed to eat a little bit of it. I had my all-time favorite -- a Snickers Blizzard. (So much for that diet!)

Did you know there is a Blizzard Fan Club? I have to admit, I am tempted to join.

Playdate follow-up

In all fairness, I feel I should report that last evening's playdate with Megan was much more pleasant than I expected. Megan's whole family (Mom, Dad, brother) are all quite nice and a good time was had by all.

I'm still a little unsure about the Mom picking Zoë up at school though...

Playdates

When did that word get coined? I can't decide if I like it. I once read an article about how it was so feminine sounding and it wasn't fair to boys, but I'm not sure I agree with that one. I guess, if you have to call it something, playdate will do, but it does conjure images of soccer moms in minivans...one of my least favorite stereotypes.

Anyway, Zoë was invited for a playdate today. Last week I found a note in her cubby at daycare from Megan's mom saying that Megan was dying to have a playdate with Zoë. (Megan obviously has good taste.) Megan's mom also says in the note that she would be happy to take Zoë home from school with her one afternoon because Megan leaves after lunch time. Megan's mom then left her email and phone number.

I have no idea which little girl is Megan and when I asked Zoë who Megan was she said, "I don't know." (Eventually she remembered.) I have never, ever met Megan's mom. Why on Earth would she think that I would let a perfect stranger take Zoë home from school? I was really, really surprised by that offer. I pretended it didn't happen when I emailed to make plans, but when we spoke on the phone, she re-iterated the offer. I didn't want to be rude, so I had to tell her that I didn't think Zoë was ready for that. Am I overprotective, or is Megan's mom just not thinking?

I am very interested to see how this playdate works out.

Happy Father's Day!

Happy Father's Day to all the great Dads out there -- especially my husband, my brother, and my own dear old Dad.

There's a good piece in the NY Times magazine today that really shows just how much impact a Dad has on his daughter. Check it out here.

Happy Anniversary Brenda & Jon

Today is my brother and sister-in-law's 9th wedding anniversary. In their honor I am posting the poem I wrote for them and read at their wedding.


There are so many more than
seven wonders.

I have seen water rush
and crash down a great cliff,
thousands of feet dropping,
merging with a lake
of stillness.
It never slows and never looks back.

There are places where the land,
so rich and vital,
produces the sweetest fruits,
purely of its own volition.
In celebration of itself.

Today we will see love and joy
create one entity.
Both beautiful with life,
an abundance to give, yet spaces to fill.
They share a love as natural as any
gift of the Earth.

There are so many more than seven wonders.
not the least of which is love.

Life's a Beach

It was actually sunny yesterday so at Zoë's suggestion we went for a picnic lunch at the beach. Despite the wind, it was a wonderful way to spend the afternoon. Husband caught this beautiful shot of Zoë. Something about it feels like a window to what she will be like as an adult.

A Star is Born!

Yesterday afternoon was Zoë's first dance recital. She has been taking a dance class all year at her daycare. It was so cute! She was terrific -- absolutely no stage fright and she was really into performing. Can't say she's going to grow up to become a dancer, but it was so much fun to watch!

And of course, here's a picture:

One Singular Sensation...

I am so excited because the revival of the musical A Chorus Line is finally happening! I have been saying for a couple of years that is time. It is my all-time favorite musical and definitely the best show I ever saw on Broadway. Advanced tickets are on sale for American Express card holders so I bought tickets for September 23 last night. Don't call me that night, I'm busy! I didn't realize, but the show will still be in previews when I will be there because it doesn't officially open until October 5. But that's OK with me.

Unsurprisingly, there is a production blog on the website for the show which is pretty entertaining. Check it out here.

Kiss today good-bye and point me toward tomorrow...

I love Maureen Dowd

I was wondering why the gay marriage issue had re-surfaced in the last couple of days and Maureen Dowd answered that question perfectly in her Op-Ed today. (Sorry if you don't have Times Select.)

Something fun to read

Check out this piece from the LA Times written by David Israel. It is quite funny!

You may recall that David Israel is the author of Behind Everyman which I wrote about last year here. The book is now slated to become a movie sometime in the future. I really look forward to that.

In search of Part 2

I was thinking about going to the movies with my husband tonight and the two top choices were X-Men 3 or Mission: Impossible III. It was then that I realized that some time was missing from my life because somehow I completely missed both X-Men 2 and Mission: Impossible II. Did I slip into some kind of time warp? Was I abducted by aliens? Was my memory erased? When did these movies come out and how did I miss them?

A quick stop on IMDB revealed that:

M:I II came out in 2000. 6 years ago! OK, I give myself a pass on that one because even if I had seen it, there is a chance I could have forgotten it. Perhaps the memory self-destructed?

X-2 was realeased in 2003. Again, I give myself a pass. I was just getting over surviving the first year of having a baby. If I did make it out to a movie, it certainly wasn't going to be to see X-2.

Interestingly enough, you know what these two movies have in common? Gay men pretending to be straight and tough. I've seen Hugh Jackman hosting the Tony's and if that isn't his authentic self then he is the world's finest actor. And I don't think I even have to start on Tom Cruise. He's just Cruis-azy!

Another mystery solved thanks to the power of the World Wide Web!

It's the little things

I may have mentioned this before, but Zoë is not really into traditional toys. And if she does like something she plays with it in a way other than it was intended. For example, Legos. She loves her Legos, but she doesn't usually build anything with them. Instead she sorts them by size. That can occupy her for quite a long time.

But really her favorite things to play with are little things like rubber bands, straws, and loose beads. I actually put rubber bands and straws in her Christmas stocking and she could not have been more thrilled -- that may actually have been the two best presents she got.

A couple of weeks ago I took her into Toys R Us to pick out a present for being a really good girl. In my mind I had set a spending limit of around $20. Without much hesitation she picked a bag of lanyard strings that cost $2.99.
"Mom, can I please get this?" she begged.
"OK, but only because you've been so good," I conceded. I almost felt bad because she could have spent more, but she was so happy to have those strings!

Of course, this is a pattern that I hope continues well into the teen years. Doubtful, I know. I'll just have to try and remember these trips to Toys R Us when I am buying her her first $100 sneakers or similar.

Dangerous Liasons

I just finished reading "Les Liaisons Dangereuses" also known as "Dangerous Liasons." What an excellent book! I can't believe I never read it before. It is kind of hard to believe this book was orignally written and published in the 18th century. Talk about risque. It was a selection from my book club and it is definitely the best book I've read with the club and the best book I've read in awhile. I definitely recommend it to just about anyone.

Must have been those 2 years I lived in Dallas...

Your Linguistic Profile::

50% General American English

35% Yankee

10% Dixie

0% Midwestern

0% Upper Midwestern

What Kind of American English Do You Speak?

Thanks to Queen of Slackers for that highly amusing link!

Justice in a book review!

The New York Times review of Curtis Sittenfeld's new book, The Man of My Dreams is out today and it is not good.
http://www.nytimes.com/2006/05/18/books/18masl.html?_r=1&oref=slogin

The very critiques given to this book could so easily have been applied to her celebrated (especially by NYTimes) debut novel, Prep. Just when I was starting to lose faith in the NYTimes book reviews, they finally do some justice. They even compared her unfavorable to Melissa Bank saying...

"The Man of My Dreams," like the similarly quotidian but more varied and
assured oeuvre of Melissa Bank, is set up as a string of lonely-hearted short
stories rather than a fully imagined novel.

(Ms. Sittenfeld gave a scathing review to Melissa Bank's book The Wonder Spot back in June of last year.)

Baby Doll

Zoë: I wish Baby Doll would hurry up and grow up.

Me: But Baby Doll is a doll, honey.

Zoë: I want her to be a big girl, like me.

Baby Doll is, of course, Zoë's baby doll. I would say favorite if there were another, but she has never wanted another baby doll. I once bought her one and she completely rejected it -- going as far as throwing it out of her room into the hallway. It was a beautiful doll, too. Finally, I gave it to my niece rather than see it constantly rejected. Zoë has the whole kingdom in stuffed animals, but there is only one Baby Doll.

So, how do I explain that she will never grow up?

Mother's Day

Spent Mother's Day at the Yankee game this year. It was a fantastic way to spend the day. Beats brunch hands down. Plus, it was Zoë's first baseball game and she loved it! She lasted until the end of the 7th inning and then had a complete meltdown followed by a very good nap in the car on the way home.



It could only have been better if the Yankees actually won.

3 sentences

Zoë read almost 3 complete sentences the other night! I can almost declare that she can read. It was amazing to listen to her sounding out each word. And then when she got it all she was so proud of herself. I almost started to cry. My little baby is reading! I remember when she couldn't hold her head up on her own. Wowza!

For anyone starting to teach a child to read I highly recommend the Bob Books published by Scholastic. They are perfect. Start with: Bob Books First! Level A, Set 1

Getting dressed

What is it about getting dressed that is so awful? Seems like every morning when I tell Zoë it is time to get dressed it is like I am telling her it is time to stick pins in herself. The whole operation takes less than 3 minutes, but she spends much more time than that in complaining about it.

This, of course, is completely different from playing dress-up. Zoë will gladly spend as much time as needed to put together the perfect Princess, Bumble Bee, Fairy, etc. costume from her dress-up box.

Garbage Cow

I know the warm weather has officially begun because we paid a visit to Garbage Cow after dinner last night.

Who's Garbage Cow? He's the big cow that stands next to the big garbage can outside Sunny Daes ice cream, of course. The first time we went to Sunny Daes, Zoë was about 1 and just learning to talk. She saw the big cow and the big garbage can and identified each "Garbage" and "Cow." A couple of days later we were driving by and she saw Sunny Daes out the car window and she shouted "Garbage Cow!" And the name has stuck from there.

I'm not sure which Zoë loves more about Sunny Daes -- the chocolate ice cream or the Garbage Cow. When we left last night, as is the case every time we're there, we had to stop and hug and kiss the cow. She told him (no convincing Zoe that cows are girls) not to worry, she'd come back and visit soon. I never thought it was possible to love a big fake cow, but clearly it is.

I hear myself everywhere

Just spent the weekend in NYC with husband. It was our first weekend away without Zoë in at least 2 and half years and it was truly wonderful. I could go into lots of romantic details, but I won't.

Instead I will go into listening to all the other parents and kids I saw. NYC is definitely a melting pot and I saw parents of just about every description and the thing I noticed is that all parents (myself included) say the same things! I couldn't help but giggle every time I heard a parent say, "Are you listening to me?" or "Pay attention" or "I told you to stop that." Frankly, it made me feel so much better to hear those same phrases that spill out of my mouth repeatedly on a daily basis. At least I am not the only one. And it wasn't just the exact phrases, it was the same tone of voice. I try to be a very conscientious parent, but sometimes it is hard to know if what you're doing is right. I'm not saying that just because everyone else is doing it, that makes it right, but it does make me feel better anyway to know my child isn't the only one who needs to be told these things.

Questions about Easter

Zoë: Where does the Easter Bunny live?
Me: At the North Pole of course.

Why is there so much Easter candy in the store -- doesn't the Easter Bunny bring the candy in baskets?

Yes, the Easter Bunny brings baskets for little girls and little boys. Grown-ups have to buy their own candy.

Does the Easter Bunny know Santa Claus?
Of course, they both live at the North Pole.

Yes, but the Easter Bunny lives underground at the North Pole and Santa lives in his village and all the elves are like his children. Right?
Right. And the Tooth Fairy lives there too.

Spring Fever

I feel like I am suffocating in my office. It is so stuffy and quiet! No more so than usual, but now that some nice weather is here, I just want to be out wandering around and enjoying it. I couldn't be happier that Zoë's daycare is closed tomorrow for Good Friday so I am forced to take a day off. I have not accomplished one thing of note this entire week.

All Partied Out

Yesterday we had the third and final party in an almost month-long celebration of Zoë's 4th birthday. Yesterday was the kids party and I think it came off pretty well. Aside from the glitter glue myniecee got in her eye (and all over her face and the wall, the floor, the table, etc.) there were no tragedies. Poor Sophia was still glittering when she left the party, but it didn't seem to slow down her good time. I think Zoë had a ball and she got some good presents too -- including a complete trunk of Princess play shoes. What a great idea that is.

Many members of my family have birthdays this time of year so there has really been a lot of celebrating lately and a lot of cake. With Easter and Passover impending, the celebrations show no sign of stopping. More cake! (Followed by many hours at the gym to pay for it all.)

Babysitter

We went out to dinner tonight and had a babysitter for Zoë. The babysitter is a very nice girl who works part time at day care. She is also a college student and Zoë just adores her. As young as this girl looks to me, and as long as it has been since I've actually babysat, it still cracks me up to be the "grown-ups" going out and not the babysitter in this scenario.

Strange Creature Found in Family Room

She's ready for a flying underwater mardi-gras adventure!*


*Thanks to JKo for that excellent description.

Mission: successful

I feel like it is some kind of triumph that I went into a Toys R Us store on Saturday and managed to purchase the exact booster seats I was looking for. I didn't even have to wait more than 10 minutes at the customer pick-up counter. The gods were smiling upon me.

Zoë's 4 year check up was this morning and she came through with flying colors. 100% healthy and completely precocious. Not even a flinch at the finger prick and very short-lived tears after the two shots. I was really impressed with her. I think the fact that we didn't tell her she would have shots until the last minute really helped because then she didn't have a chance to build up anxiety.

I have a cold

Did you know it is nearly impossible to sleep when you can't breathe through your nose? I've lately discovered that fact.

I can't remember being quite this stuffed up before. I'm not a big fan of taking cold medicine because it leaves me feeling so completely out of it no matter how non-drowsy it claims to be, but I think I may have to break down and buy some.

The thing that really annoys me is that I have been well all the cold and dreary winter long and now that some beautiful, sunny, warm Spring weather has finally come our way, I'm feeling rather crappy and not much like getting out and enjoying.

Oh well. I should probably find something real to complain about.

Big plans for the weekend include buying a booster seat for Zoë! Bye-bye old car seat, my little girl is growing up. Zoë is not the only one excited about this.
I've chosen this one:
Graco Turbo Booster
I'm sure buying a booster seat doesn't sound like such a big deal, but every time she grows past some piece of baby equipment (like the high chair, bottles, etc.) I feel it is a milestone of her growing up. What everyone says is, in this case, actually true -- it goes by so fast!

Birthday party hell

This past Saturday I took Zoë to one of her daycare classmate's birthday party. It was at a kid's music class place in Wilton. It started off well. The kids all sat around in a circle while "Robert the Guitar Guy" played music and used puppets and silly voices. Zoë was very into it and she was her usual boisterous self and a bit dominating in the area of answering questions or offering suggestions when Guitar Guy asked for them. Nothing that she was doing was aggressive or out of turn, however. She was just very involved and hasn't learned to contain herself.

Then, at one point all the kids were supposed to be sitting up and Zoë pointed out that two of the little boys were still lying down. Guitar Guy turns to her and says, "Zoë you know what? Your job is Zoë." And it was in this nasty tone of voice. Thank goodness my daughter came back with this, "My name is Zoë, my job isn't Zoë:."

And thank goodness that she isn't old enough to have been embarrassed by a comment like that. I wanted to throttle the guy. He is neither her parent nor her teacher and had no right to speak to her that way. It was a birthday party! A few of the other mothers commented on how inappropriate they thought he was which made me feel better. I am still in the middle of composing my nasty email to "Robert the Guitar Guy".

The Food Channel

Is it just me, or does it seem completely counter-intuitive to watch cooking shows on the food channel while working out at the gym?

It's good to be home, but...

it was kind of nice to be away too.

I just got back from a quick business trip to Boston and the best part about it was going out for drinks last night and not having to worry about getting home, or driving, or getting up the next day, or even paying. It felt a little like my old single days and it was fun.

It also didn't hurt that my hotel was quite nice -- The Westin at Copley Square. The rooms have modern decor and they have what they call the "heavenly bed." I am happy to report it lived up to its name. I slept dead center in that heavenly bed and was very happy not to have to share it. We were discussing the beds last night and I commented that when you're single and you walk into a hotel room and see a bed like that you wonder who you can get to join you in it, but when you're married with kids, you look at a bed like that and smile knowing you get it all to yourself.

The girl turned 4

With much fanfare, cake, and almost a dozen balloons, Zoë turned 4 yesterday! She wore a crown all day that said "Birthday Girl" and she loved every minute of the day. It was the first year she really got into celebrating her birthday and really understood that all the festivities were just for her. I had to sing "Happy Birthday" multiple times.

First question when she woke up this morning:
Mom, when will I be 5?

7:30 AM Sunday

Zoë had just crawled into bed with my husband and me and we were snuggling. It was delicious. Then sitting up a little Zoë notices a box of Reeses Pieces sitting on my nightstand. She instinctively seemed to know it was something good.

Zoë: Mommy, what's that orange box?

Me: (trying to think of a plausible fib, but coming up empty and finally admitting) It's candy.

Zoë: What kind? I never saw that before.

Me: Reeses Pieces.

Zoë: What do they taste like?

You gotta give the kid credit for cleverness!

March madness

Despite the fact that March is the month in which my beautiful daughter Zoë was born, I think I am starting to hate this month -- maybe even moreso than February. February doesn't make any false pretenses about itself.

Things I hate about March:

1. The changeable weather. One minute it is 65 degrees and sunny and you're taking off your coat and the next minute it has dropped 30 degrees, snow is expected and you're wondering where you left your gloves.


2. Shopping for clothing is impossible. All the clothes and shoes in the stores are all for Spring -- Spring somewhere a lot warmer that is around here. Try buying your almost 4-year-old a party/Easter/Passover dress when everything they have is shortsleeved or sleeveless. You just can't count on it being warm enough for that kind of thing.


3. St. Patrick's Day. No offense to the Irish, but come on, this is a day that has gotten way out of control. It has been completely "Hallmarked." Next thing you know people are going to start buying St. Patrick's Day presents. I'm all for a green beer or a green bagel, but I think we've really entered the land of overkill now.


4. March madness. I am a basketball fan, but who can keep up with all those college teams? It's just an excuse to go drink beer -- as if the world needed another one of those.


5. Spring Break related news stories. Enough already. We all know just how drunk you can get in Cancun.

Do I sound like a total March Grinch, or what???

Bored

I am so bored today. It's not like I don't have work to do, but I just can't bring myself to do it because it is just so boring. I am in a complete funk and just want to go lay down somewhere and watch Dr. Phil or something. Sigh. I've even tried playing my favorite online game, Text Twist, but I think that has only made things worse. I want this day to be over now. And damn the fact that it is only Tuesday. I really have no idea how I am going to get through the rest of this week.

Mom, I need you!

Around 8:45 this evening (about an hour after she is supposed to be in bed and sleeping) I hear Zoë call out "Mom, I need you!" Usually the delay tactics are more along the lines of "I have to potty" or "I'm thirsty" so I went up to see why it was that she needed me.

"Mom! I looked out the window and there are kids playing outside in the middle of the night!" Her eyes were completely lit up and she looked at me expectantly. "I saw them outside," she repeated.

I explained to her that those kids outside are older and older kids are allowed to stay up later.

"Mommy, when I get to be 8, can I play outside in the middle of the night?"

Of course I said yes. What else could I say???

Conversation with Papa

Zoë: Papa, you need a wife.

Papa: I agree. I'm working on it. I'd like to have a wife.

Zoë: What will you name her?

Book club

Just got home from my book club. This month's selection was "My Name is Red" by Orhan Pamuk. To be honest, I hated this book. The only other person who openly admitted to hating it, decided not to even come to the discussion because she couldn't even finish it. It was a struggle for me to finish it, that's for sure. And I cannot figure out what the others saw in this, let alone anyone else who's enjoyed this book. I honestly think that, as is the case with some really inscrutable films, people claim to like this book because they don't get it at all and figure that if it is so hard to understand, it must be good. I am not afraid to admit that I didn't get this book and I really don't want to.

Happily, next month's selection is "Jane Eyre."

The Wizard Voz

We just spent our half a snow day watching The Wizard Voz. Twice. In a row.

Yes, of course, I mean the The Wizard of Oz, but Zoë insists it is "Voz" and who am I to argue?

Isn't it interesting how young kids aren't sure the movie will turn out the same way it did last time? Maybe this time the Wicked Witch won't get melted and Dorothy won't get back to Kansas. Repeated viewings are necessary just to be sure. I guess that explains how I could stand to watch repeats of The Brady Bunch night after night when I was a kid. We didn't have a DVD player or even a VCR back then.

I'm taking my toys and I'm going home

If I could have said/done that today I would have. I would have gone home and had a good sulk.

We've just about survived another February

Which brings to mind one of my favorite quotes from one of my favorite books by one of my favorite authors:

(Jitterbug Perfume by Tom Robbins)

They say that February is the shortest month, but you know they could be wrong.

Compared, calendar page against calendar page, it looks to be the shortest, all right. Spread between January and March like lard on bread, it fails to reach the crust on either slice. In its galoshes it's a full head shorter than December, although in leap years, when it has growth spurts, it comes up to April's nose.

However more abbreviated than it's cousins it may look, February feels longer than any of them. It is the meanest moon of winter, all the more cruel because it will masquerade as spring, occasionally for hours at a time, only to rip off it's mask with a sadistic laugh and spit icicles into every gullible face, behavior that grows quickly old.

Febuary is pitiless, and it's boring. That parade of red numerals on its page adds up to zero: birthdays of politicians, a holiday reserved for rodents, what kind of celebrations are those? The only bubble in the flat champagne of February is Valentine's Day. It was no acident that our ancestors pinned Valentine's day on February's shirt: he or she lucky enough to have a lover in frigid, antsy February has cause for celebration, indeed.

Except to the extent that it "tints the buds and swells the leaves within" February is as useless as the extra r in it's name. It behaves like an obstacle, a wedge of slush and mud and ennui holding both progress and contentment at bay.

If February is the color of lard on rye, its aroma is that of wet wool trousers. As for sound, it is an abstract melody played on a squeaky violin, the petty whine of a shrew with cabin fever. O February, you may be little but you're small! Were you twice your tiresome length, few of us would survive to greet the merry month of May.

Cake is not lunch

OK, sometimes cake can be lunch, but not for 3 and 4 year-olds.

I took Zoë to a birthday party this morning -- the second party this month I must add. The party started at 10:30 and was to end at 12. That's a little shorter than the usual party, but that didn't bother me. What did bother me was that after we did t-shirt painting and then the birthday girl opened her presents (note to self: do not open presents at party) we went into the dining room for cake and juice boxes. No lunch was served. There was some fruit and muffins in the kitchen, but that was supposedly for the parents. Is it just me who thinks giving their kid cake before lunch is a bad idea???? I don't get it.

A day well spent

There is something so satisfying about a day well spent. I took a personal day today and I:

• slept late


• took the train to NYC


• visited very good friend and her very handsome new baby boy


• went to the Much exhibit at MoMA


• bought excellent boots on sale

Said boots:

My new nephew!

Welcome Joseph David!
born: 02/17/06, 7:16 am, 7lbs. 110z., 20 inches

Does the food fall on the baby?

Zoë often asks me the most interesting questions.

Today while I was driving her to school we were talking about my sister-in-law, her aunt, who is about to have a baby. Zoë asked me this question:

Mommy, when Aunt Brenda eats, does the food fall on the baby?

I could tell by the way she asked that she had really been thinking this one over. And when you think about it, that is a perfectly reasonable question since for months we have all been telling her that Aunt Brenda has a baby growing in her belly.

Made for Saturday Night Live

Is it just me or are you also having a hard time mustering up sympathy for Harry Whittington? (The guy our V.P. accidentally shot.)

The writers for Saturday Night Live couldn't have dreamed up something this great, but at least they have fantastic material for this week's show.

Although, I think Jon Stewart already beat them to it. The Daily Show was absolutely hysterical last night. I was laughing so hard I was crying. I tivo'd it and watched it all over again right away. I plan to watch it again tonight.

It seems like we just had...

...an entire winter's snow all at once! Yikes!

I am hopeful that we've gotten it all overwith in one fell swoop.

It's always Thursday

When I was in college my roommate used to say that it was always Thursday.

She was right. If it isn't actually Thursday, it will be Thursday tomorrow or it was Thursday yesterday. Thursday is a good day and a great night for happy hour. (Not that I've been to happy hour since I got pregnant, but I used to have a really great time at happy hour.) Even Thursday night TV is usually good.

I guess once you make it to Thursday you've basically made it through the week and you stop paying attention to what day it is until Monday. No one wants to think too much about Monday. You shoulder up to the grindstone for another week and wait for Thursday to roll around again when you can start to feel the pressure lift off a bit and start thinking about the weekend. And it starts all over again.

Selective hearing

I was talking to a friend today who has a daughter almost the same age as Zoë and we were complaining about how challenging this age can be. I told my friend that I was seriously considering getting Zoë's hearing checked because I could be standing right in front of her and talking right to her face and yet she will seemingly not hear me at all. Not hear me at all. It is an amazing thing. The other thing Zoë will do is say "what, Mom?" repeatedly. This is how it usually goes:
"Zoë put the that down."
no response
"Zoë, I said put that down. Do you hear me?"
"What, Mom?"
"Put that down."
"What, Mom?"
"Are you listening? I said put that down."
"What, Mom?"
"Is it that you can't hear me or you don't understand what I am saying?"
"I hear you."
"What did I say?"
"I don't know."
blowing top now "I said put that down! Put it down now!"

I know it sounds inane bordering on the impossible, but this is true.

Anyway, the good news is I can hold off on the hearing check -- and hold onto my $20 co-pay -- because my friend's daughter does the same thing and she really did get her hearing checked and she was fine.

hospitals

Sunday night my father-in-law was taken to the emergency room at 3 AM. There's nothing like that middle of the night phone call to start your heart, huh? Actually I thought it was going to be my brother or sister-in-law. My sister-in-law is due with her second baby in about a month so it is not out of the question. Anyway, my father-in-law is now doing OK. He seems to be suffering some complications from the painkillers he takes regularly. They are keeping him in the hospital for at least another night, but I am happy to say he should be going home soon. It was a really good scare though. My father-in-law is 83 and not in the best of health. I wonder at times like these how my husband will deal with his inevitable passing.

And in related news, my boss went in for his surgery today. He has colon cancer and they went in to remove the tumor and probably a pretty large chunk of his intestines as well. I finally just got an email from his mother saying he is out of surgery. I think recovery will be tough for him, but I never saw someone with an attitude better than his. All the time that he has been going through this I think I only saw him visibly down once. Amazing.

I hate hospitals.

6 more weeks of winter

Phil, I even said please. When's the last time you predicted an early Spring anyway?

I have decided not to believe you this year.

Anyway, I'd rather believe that my buying a new winter coat and new snow boots ensured a winter with minimal snow.

Dear Punxsutawney Phil

I hope you're having a restful winter. Please don't see your shadow tomorrow.

Sincerely,
ZoesMom

Happy Birthday Husband!

Today is my husband's 40th birthday. It's kind of weird to think that my husband is 40. That sounds so grown up! And I don't really think of either of us as grown-ups. He seems to be taking it pretty well in stride. He was a little distressed about it in the weeks leading up, but I think he's over it by now. I think I'd like to keep him around for at least 40 more birthdays.

A prevailing bad mood

I'm not sure what it is, but I seem to be consistently in a bad mood these days -- especially in the evenings. Maybe I'm not getting enough sleep or I'm eating the wrong foods or possibly it is the winter blues. Maybe I just need some more vitamin D -- seeing the sun for only 2 minutes a day starts to catch up to me at this point in winter. Whatever it is, I wish I could shake it. (Not like a Polaroid picture, more like a sandy towel.)

Zoe Bright and Dark

Way back in early middle school, I read this book, "Lisa Bright and Dark" about a teenager who has some kind of bi-polar disorder and she completely cracks up over the course of the book. It was kind of a scary read for a kid.

Anyway, sometimes I think Zoë is behaving like she suffers some sort of bi-polar disorder even though I eventually realize it is just a case of being 3. One minute she is behaving like a good, calm, sane child and the next she is screaming and crying over some mysterious injustice or minor injury. I don't expect her to behave perfectly all the time, I just would like to find a way to extend the periods of good behavior and minimize the bad and seemingly insane behavior. Any advice here would be appreciated. As long as it isn't wait another 2 years.

On a completely unrelated note, I measured Zoë this morning and she has grown almost 4 inches in the last year!

A good day for a tantrum

Today would have been a good day for a tantrum. If only it were socially acceptable for 35 year-olds to have tantrums, I certainly would have been lying on the floor flailing arms, kicking and screaming at least once today. And it could have been as early as 7:15 AM when I returned home from the gym to find my husband still sleeping when he should have been up and showering. That got things off on the wrong foot for the day and my mood never recovered. Given the rest of my day, it never really had a chance, but that is a long, boring story filled with minutiae. I really think the kicking and screaming might have helped.

The more I think about it, the more I think how much I could really use a wife just like me. Then I would never have to set an alarm clock or worry about there being food in the house or soap in the shower. I know, I've said this all before and I am sure I will say it again so stay tuned...

google.cn

This blog is not a space I usually use to express my political opinions, but in this instance, I can't help it.

Yesterday, Google announced a new and special version of their search engine created especially to comply with the rules of the Chinese government. This version excludes e-mail messaging and the ability to create blogs, but that is not the part that really gets me. This new Google will comply with Chinese law and censor information deemed inappropriate or illegal by the Chinese authorities. Specific words will be blocked including: Tibet, Falun Gong and Tiananmen Square. Additionally, they will pass user information back to the government. From today's NY Times article:

In one case two years ago, Yahoo provided information that helped the government convict a Chinese journalist, who was sentenced to 10 years in prison, on charges of leaking state secrets to a foreign Web site.

I don't feel good about this. It makes me want to stop using Google, and Yahoo for that matter. Aren't these companies rich enough without trading in civil rights for more profit? I know there is a great desire to be in the Chinese market place, but if companies like Google and Yahoo who can afford to ban doing business with China would do so, it would be an incredible statement.

Again from the NY Times:

The Paris-based group Reporters Without Borders, which tracks the activities of Western technology companies seeking to do business with repressive regimes, condemned the Google-China deal as "hypocrisy" and called it "a black day for freedom of expression in China" in a statement published on its Web site.

Remember the Alamo! part dos

It can be lonely traveling on business. Especially when I'm in the hotel alone at times I would normally be with Zoë and husband or Mom. It feels so quiet without them and strange to be all by myself.

Yesterday I was so happy to be home from San Antonio and back with my loving family. That lasted until about 11:30PM last night when my husband began having repeated coughing fits that woke me up each time. Now, before you think I am unsympathetic to some illness he is suffering, let it be known that he has been having this same cough for weeks and weeks and I have asked him many times to go to the doctor. He does not have a cold. Then shortly after he finally settled down to sleep (around 1AM), Zoë woke up crying, "I can't find Eyore!" Eyore is one of her beloved so I knew I had to get up and help her find him wherever he had wandered off to (deep under the covers it turned out). This then led to "I have to go potty" and "I need a drink of water" and finally "Please snuggle" and it was almost 2AM by the time I got back into my own bed. By that time I was seriously missing that quiet and lonely hotel room!

Remember the Alamo!

I was just in San Antonio for the past few days on business and I got to see the Alamo. It is conveniently located downtown and across the street from the wax museum. And it turns out to be kind of a depressing and somber place to visit. In essence it is a place where an awful lot of people were killed and it is much like visiting a big grave. Complete with bullet holes and gift shop.

Overall, I think the trip was good. I did my best at work and I got to see one of my best friends, her husband and their daughter. Their daughter is so incredibly well behaved that it made me feel that I must be doing something seriously wrong in my own parenting. It's not as if her parents are extremely strict either -- she is just naturally good and sweet. I have to admit I felt slightly better when the little girl had a minor tantrum when Mom said no to buying her a book. That was more like it!

Little boys are kissing my daughter

Today when I picked up Zoë to take her home from school, one of the little boys in her class hugged and kissed her good-bye. Yikes!

Happy Birthday to me

As per usual, the weather on my birthday (Sunday) was total crap. Woke up to howling winds, snow and ice. Nope, no trip to the big apple for me. It's just not fun to walk around in that kind of weather -- even just a few blocks. I was quite disappointed at the turn of events, but not at all surprised. We were supposed to go meet Duncan too, but Zoë's kennel cough re-appeared Saturday night and her nose was running so that cancelled that idea. You just can't bring a snotty-nosed 3-year-old to the home of a newborn. Especially not one that is only a little over a week old. Next time, we'll weather the weather if there's no illness.

Anyway, the day didn't turn out all bad. I had a fabulously relaxing breakfast in bed prepared by Mom and Zoë. I actually lounged in my bed until almost 10 am! Unheard of! I got some swell gifts too.

All-in-all turning 35 was mostly painless and even some fun.

Friendly's

Who doesn't like Friendly's? If you don't know what I mean and you've never experienced a Fribble, you need to go out and find the nearest Friendly's restaurant ASAP.

We've just come from dinner at this fine dining establishment and they have got how to make kids happy in a restaurant down pat. From the blue and pink soda drinks to the Monster Mash sundae to the giant tub of crayons, life is good as a kid at Friendly's. At least for my kid. She had a ball and she was definitely the loudest kid in the place. Where does such a little person get such a big voice?

Turns out Friendly's is also the place for divorced dads. There was no less than 5 tables of kids with just their dad. It can't be that it was mom's night out for everyone -- unless I missed an important memo.

Neil Diamond -- 12 Songs

Believe it or not, Neil Diamond's new CD is really good. I am listening to it now. I mean it's not the old stuff like Sweet Caroline, but it is good. Two thumbs up for good old Neil.

Open the windows!

Today I opened the window in my office! It was a beautiful thing for the 10th of January.

It's been unusually warm here in the Northeast the last couple of days and it has really been wonderful. The last few winters have been so cold and snowy, we were definitely due for a milder winter. Of course, the tables could still turn, but by this time last year I had already shoveled my driveway 5 or 6 times. In a way I think I insured a milder winter by finally breaking down and buying new snow boots this year.

Don't worry, I know February is busy getting itself ready as I type.

Opportunity, is that you?

I really hope so. I've been waiting by the door for you.

I don't want to jinx this one by even writing about it here, but if it does happen, I promise to let you know.


(It has nothing to do with pregnancy.)

Welcome Duncan!

Got some great news last night about the birth of Duncan. The new Mom, my long-time friend, and baby are both doing well. I can't wait to visit them. Congratulations to the new family!

It's funny how long ago those newborn days seem -- especially now as Zoë's fourth birthday rapidly approaches. I can't say I miss those days, but there is something amazing about just holding your baby in the first few weeks. I remember looking at her for hours and I just couldn't believe I made something so perfectly beautiful. Every little turn of the head is a moment of amazement.

I also remember how good it felt to roll over in bed for the first time and not have that huge belly in my way anymore.

Return to school

I'm sure you know that Christmas Carol "It's Beginning to Look a lot Like Christmas." There's a line in the song that goes...

And Mom and Dad can hardly wait for school to start again.

When I was a kid I used to think that line wasn't very nice, but now, NOW, I totally get it. I mean I GET IT.

Yesterday Zoë's school was closed because of what turned out to be mostly a slush storm so I stayed at home with her and did my best to work from home. For most of the day we couldn't even really go anywhere because it was so gross outside and after the second viewing of "Madagascar" cabin fever began to set in and I thought she was literally going to start bouncing off the walls.

With the holidays and the snow, we've just had too many days at home lately and she really needed to be back at school running around. That kid has so much energy! This morning I had to take her to a doctor's appointment and we arrived a few minutes early and the office wasn't open yet. There was nowhere to sit or anything -- we just had to stand in the hall. No one was around so I told Zoë to see how fast she could run to the end of the hallway and back. I was half joking, half serious, but she did it! Multiple times. It was hysterical to watch. All that running and she was barely even winded. I definitely need to get her involved in more physical activities. Thank goodness school was back in session today.

Zoë's birthday

I realized the other day that I have to get started planning Zoë's 4th birthday party. We have already received an invitation for Deanna's birthday party in February.

At first I was thinking I would do it at the Beardsley Zoo, but that idea was complicated by the fact that only one child is allowed per adult. That means that some of the parents would have to -- or I would have to pay an additional entrance fee. Plus, despite the fact that we are waiting until early April to have the party, the weather is so unpredictable that time of year and it could really put a monkey wrench into enjoying the zoo. (pun intended)

After abandoning that idea I began scouring the internet for other party location ideas and finally ended up deciding I was better off hosting the party at home. For a brief moment I considered having a musician come, but for the 7 or 8 kids I am planning to invite, that seemed utterly ridiculous. Finally, I came up with a good idea -- BEADS! Zoë loves beads and it seems that most kids around her age do to. So, I'll buy a bunch of big, plastic beads that are easy to work with and the kids can make some bracelets and necklaces, have pizza and cake and then go home. Party -- done.

Wasn't it just the other day that I was planning her first birthday party??? Wow, I can still remember just about every detail of that party. It truly was a momentous occasion. For me more so than anyone, I think.

Back to life

Back to reality tomorrow. The holidays are all over and I have a major project due to launch in 3 months and we are nowhere near on schedule. It is definitely going to be a Tylenol PM night as I try not to think about all the things I conveniently ignored over the last 2 weeks. At least it is only work worries that are plaguing me. Those are easy to shake off. It's all the other stuff that can really get you down -- or keep you up as the case may be.

Good-bye 2005

I can't say I'm really sorry to see this year go. It hasn't been particularly bad or anything, but I feel ready to move on.

I really look forward to seeing the changes in Zoë this year. I can't believe she will be 4 in less than 3 months. By this time next year we will be registering her for kindergarten. Amazing! She is such a wonderful little girl. She has grown up a lot this year and I am sure this coming year will bring a lot of exciting things for her like learning to read and write, doing more and more for herself, and all things l look forward to doing with her for the first time like ice skating and maybe a Broadway show.

My big question is what are my New Year's resolutions and what do I want to accomplish in the year ahead of me. I don't count weight loss as a resolution this year. I am carrying that one over from last year. Yes, I have put back on a few of the pounds that I lost over the last year, but I am sure I will lose those and hope to continue and lose a few more this year.

I think my resolution for this year is going to have to be another old favorite -- I want to get my finances in order. We still have too much debt and not enough savings so we have to keep working on paying down the debt. I want to encourage Husband to find another job where he makes a somewhat more consistent and hopefully a slightly higher income. He is miserable in his current job and that really affects a lot of things. I want to try and get us on some kind of budget and I need to curtail the frivolous spending. I bought a lot of clothes and shoes in the last year -- that needs to slow down. I hope to be able to take a real vacation again someday. Maybe not this year, but hopefully by 2007.

Christmas is over

The presents are all unwrapped, the food has been eaten and eaten and eaten, the stocking have been emptied, and the lights have been unplugged. I am feeling fat and finally relaxed. An awful lot of work goes into that one day and I have to say I am glad it only comes once a year.

Despite my complaints, Zoë had a good Christmas and that makes me very happy. Santa brought both things on her wish list and a whole bunch more stuff. She's even been happily playing with a lot of her new toys. She's not usually that big into toys -- strange as that may sound. Santa brought a pink Doodle Bear and a bell from his sleigh (just like in the book The Polar Experss). But, I think the best present from Santa may have been the two pair of scissors (toddler scissors, of course) that were in her stocking. You may recall from my post in the spring that Husband threw out her scissors after an unfortunate hair-cutting incident. She is so happy to be allowed scissors again.

Zoë got so many toys that I actually put some away to play with at a later date. Anything that she didn't want to open immediately I put away for a rainy day.

I'm not yet sure what my best present was. I got some really nice things and I was definitely spoiled so I definitely can't complain. I have a few returns to make, but that can be fun too.

Now, I have several dozen hours to put in at the gym in order to undo all the eating damage I have done in the past week or so.

The stockings are hung

by the chimney with care in the hopes that St. Nicholas soon would be there.

That reminds me, I once lost a spelling bee because of the word chimney. Needless to say I have never misspelled it again.

Our annual Christmas Eve party has concluded and now comes the relaxation portion of the holiday. Just as my husband likes to go skiing because he looks forward to the afterward (sitting in the lodge, drinking hot chocolate, feeling flush from the exercise/outdoors), I feel the same about our annual party.

Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night!

5:54 am

Why is it that on the mornings when I set my alarm I always feel that I could easily go back to sleep instantly, but on the rare mornings that I allow myself to "sleep in" my eyes pop open some time before 6 am? This morning I woke at 5:54 to be precise and I was wide awake and ready to go. What is that about? I used to think it was because when I didn't have my alarm set I was afraid I was going to sleep too late, so I tried setting my alarm for later, but that didn't work either. Without fail, I still wake up earlier than necessary.

At least it gave me time to shave my legs.

"Holiday" sweaters

You've seen them on some of the 40 and 50 something women around your office and around the mall -- the "holiday sweater." It's a phenomenon I will never understand -- or be a part of.

Dessert Party

Tonight is a "dessert party" night for Zoë. Whenever husband and I go out I let Zoë have lots of desserts -- thus the party idea. I arrange a plate for her with cookies and candies. It is something I started when we were going through a strong bought of separation anxiety and it has been quite effective. I know, sweets probably aren't the best reward, but it works. It gives her something to look forward to rather than worrying about me not being home.

Meanwhile, tonight must be the biggest party night of the holiday season -- with the exception of New Year's Eve, of course. We have been invited to three parties all in the same night. Husband and I are hardly social animals so this is quite the unusal occurence. We are going to do our best to attend 2 out of the 3 parties. I am looking forward to putting on my party clothes in a couple of hours and hopefully getting into the holiday spirit a bit more. Christmas Eve and our own annual bash is only a week away now. Wow. Is it just me, or does it seem like the Earth is spinning a little faster these days?

Happy un-Birthday

December 15 is my un-birthday. It isn't my half birthday, but a completely fake birthday. When I was young my parents managed to get a fake birth certificate for me saying I was born December 15, 1970 -- exactly one month earlier than my actual birthday. The reason for this was to get me into kindergarten rather than having me wait another year. For years I had to celebrate my birthday in school by bringing cupcakes on December 15. My birthday parties were around December 15 and I only celebrated my real birthday with my family. At some point the whole thing just went away. I think it was when we moved when I was in 5th grade. Every year the date December 15 stands out in my mind whenever I hear it until I remember, as I just did, that it is my un-birthday.

Right now, I could go for a cupcake. Yellow cake, buttercream frosting, and a candle. And maybe 20 5 year-olds singing happy birthday.

Christmas Tree Chopping

This past Sunday we went to Jones Tree Farm in Shelton, CT for our annual Christmas Tree chopping. As has become our tradition we went with my brother, my sister-in-law and my niece, Sophia and of course, we brought our dog, Spanky. I was really looking forward to it this year because Zoë was so excited about it. Unfortunately, Zoë had a jealous attack that kind of put a damper on the fun. I was holding one of Sophia's hands while my sister-in-law held the other so we could help her walk through the snow and Zoë just did not like that. Among lots of other little bad behaviors, she kept asking to be carried which was just not possible given how much she now weighs and how much snow we had to trudge through. And every time husband or I said no, we wouldn't carry her, she started to cry or whine. Part of me felt angry about it because she was ruining what should have been a lot of fun, but the other half of me just felt badly that she still feels so jealous of Sophia. I know she is only 3 and it is my job to help her with this kind of thing, but it doesn't stop it from being frustrating.

When we got home that afternoon and I finally had to send her to her room because her behavior was getting out of control, I realized I needed to talk to her about it. I did my best to explain to her that I love her more than anyone, but I also love Sophia and I don't get to see Sophia every day or even every week so when we're together I like to play with her. I told Zoë that didn't mean that I loved her any less. And just like she loves her Aunt, Sophia loves me too. I said, "You're my number 1, 2, and 3. Sophia is just number 4."
"I want to be number 4," was Zoë's reply.
"Then what can Sophia be?"
"I want to be 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, and 6. Sophia can be 7."
"OK," I agreed.

I just hope a little of what I said got through.

On the bright side, we did get a beautiful tree. It is a white pine and it is huge! Apparently white pine is a native Connecticut species of tree. I keep calling it the tree that ate our house. Husband put the lights on last night tonight we will decorate it. Zoë can't wait to put the star on top.

Pride and Prejudice

I went to see Pride and Prejudice for the second time tonight. It wasn't exactly my choice to see the movie for the second time, but it turned out to be really good -- again. It really is one of the best film interpretations of the book that I have seen. There's only two things that bothered me about the movie:

1. Keira Knightley's very obvious wig. I'm really not sure why the wig designer couldn't do a better job or why they couldn't have just given her hair extensions.


2. The bite on Sixteen Candles ending. I haven't read it recently, but I don't remember that scene from the book. I'm not sure, but I think Ms. Austen would have been embarrassed and appalled.
   

Second snow of the season

This storm had a much better reception. It was the perfect snow storm, actually. It started around 4:30am Friday so it didn't make getting home from work Thursday night difficult. It snowed heavily all morning making the morning commute treacherous thus all the local schools were closed including Zoë's daycare. And, best of all, my office was closed! Therefore I didn't even have to try to really work from home with Zoë here. I did some work, but nothing much. It stopped snowing around 11 and it warmed up so a lot of it just melted and we were able to get out of the house and go out for lunch by 1pm on Friday.

How?

There is a piece in today's NY Times about an eleven-year-old girl who...

...was taken to the hospital three months ago with a terrifying catalog of injuries.

Her teeth were broken, her face was swollen, her chest had old and new burns. She was extremely thin, her abdomen was sunken, she had cuts and sores, and her temperature was 81 degrees.

But the most severe injury was in Haleigh's brain: her brain stem was partly sheared, doctors said, leaving her in a vegetative state.

My question is -- how could anyone do that to a little girl? I just cannot wrap my mind around it. I don't even want to begin to understand it.

First snow of the season

Woke up this morning to find it snowing and about an inch on the ground already. Usually I enjoy the first snow -- it's pretty and makes everything look clean. This time I just found it depressing. It's just the start of another season of complaining about the weather.

NY Times 10 Best Books for 2005

Today the NY Times named the 10 best books for 2005. I do usually consider the NY Times to be an authority on subjects such as this -- most subjects actually, but I have to raise a red flag because "Prep" by Curtis Sittenfeld is #3 on this list. That book just wasn't that good. When it was first gloriously reviewed back in January I giddily rushed right out and bought a hardcover copy at full price. Sadly, I was disappointed. The book left me very flat. There is nothing new or particularly revealing in this book that makes it any more special than a hundred other books that were published this year. I would really like my $21.95 back.

Given all the press that the NY Times has given Ms. Sittenfeld -- including allowing her write nasty reviews of fellow female author's work, my only conclusion can be that there is some serious nepotism here. I mean really, how can you even put "Prep" in the same room with "Saturday" by Ian McEwan or "On Beauty" by Zadie Smith? Something is rotten in New York.

ADD day

All day today I felt like I had ADD. I would start one thing, get distracted by something else, and on and on not really getting any one thing completed until I couldn't take any more and just shut down my computer and left at 4:56pm. It just wasn't even worth waiting the extra 4 minutes. Nothing good would have come of it.

My guess is it was the fault of the Godiva chocolate that arrived at my office today. 3 huge golden boxes full. I had 2 or 3 pieces. I'm not a big fan of truffles -- they are too much for me, but I do flip for the cherry cordials. The Godiva ones are good, of course, but in truth I would rather have the Cello Chocolate Cherries that appear in CVS this time of year. I think I prefer the fake chocolate and the fake liquor to the real stuff. That's probably a little pathetic, but what can you do. I'm just a little white trash at heart. The Godiva caramels, however, cannot be beat.

Perhaps I better skip the grande latte tomorrow?

Belle of the Ball

Last night was my father's uncle's 80th birthday party. It was a big shindig at a catering hall in Queens. There were lots of relatives I haven't seen in a long time and an open bar. Zoë was the belle of the ball in my estimation and she seemed to have a fantastic time. I'm not sure what was the best part for her -- the 15 balloons she got to take home that had tied to her wrist all night, the shirley temples I let her drink, or the attention she was lavished with.

I survived another Thanksgiving

Too bad for the turkeys, but I managed to survive another Thanksgiving. This year wasn't too bad -- no major disasters, but I am still dreaming of the day I spend Thanksgiving on a warm sandy beach sipping colorful cocktails. A girl can dream.

"Walk the Line"

We saw Walk the Line last night. Frankly, it was a compromise choice, but in fact, it was really good. I've never really been a fan of Joaquin Phoenix, but he really did a great job as Johnny Cash. Overall the movie was a bit like "Ray," the white version, but it was a lot less trite. I definitely recommend it.

Thanksgiving blues increased

Now that the very week of the dreaded day is actually here, I am feeling a sense of impending doom even more so. I have taken the week off from work in an attempt to take some of the sting off. Actually, that has been my tradition for the last few years now and it seems to help. On Wednesday my husband and I are going for retail fest at the Palisades Mall. That should really help to bolster me through the day. Especially since Zoë will be sleeping over my Dad's house Wednesday night and that means Thursday morning will start out quiet and slow. I'm still not sure that will really help.

Night time evil-doings

It seems that strange demons are possessing my daughter in the night these days. Instead of going to sleep as she is supposed to she has been getting up and trashing her room. At first it was just taking the extra blankets out of her dresser and putting them all into the bed with her and then it was taking out all the blankets plus half the books on the bookshelf and tons of the little annoying stuffed animals tossed randomly around the room. Last night was the topper, however, when she decided to rifle through all her dresser drawers and re-arrange them and then do the same in her closet. Upon discovery it would be an understatement to say that I was not amused. After the previous episode to last night I told her that if she did it again I was going to take all of the toys out of her room and so that is exactly what I did at 10:30 last night. I removed every single toy with the exception of stuffed animals and piled them all up in the hallway. I was so furious with her that I was still angry this morning when I woke up. I am the one who spends the time to clean and organize her room. I spent one whole day of my one week's vacation this summer simply re-arranging and re-organizing her bedroom. To see all that effort so easily trashed is infuriating. Especially because she was supposed to be sleeping. I want to trust my daughter, but sometimes she makes it very difficult.

Nothing makes you feel like a good mom like yelling at your child until she is shaking and crying. I guess I won't be getting that mother of the year award after all.

No more nap time?

It's hard to believe, but I think Zoë is going to give up napping soon. She has been skipping her naps at school a lot lately and when she does nap she has a hard time falling asleep at night. As much as I have often enjoyed those couple of hours to myself on Saturday and Sunday afternoons, I will be very happy to be done with nap time. It will make planning the day so much easier if I don't have to incorporate a 2 to 3 hour break right in the middle. So far the best benefit has been that she is sleeping later in the mornings. Some mornings I actually have to wake her up. This is the same kid who would regularly be up at 5:45AM less than a year ago. The later mornings are a big relief.

At the same time it is hard to believe my little baby is growing into such a big girl already. I know I am hardly the first parent to say this, but it all really does go by so quickly. When you first bring home a baby everyone tells you that, but it is hard to understand -- especially when the day-to-day is so rough going. Then all of a sudden you wake up one day and your baby is turning 2 then 3 and then she isn't even a baby anymore.

The Paper Clip Project

Last night, just by chance, I watched an excellent documentary called "Paper Clips." It is showing on HBO. I'm not sure if the actual documentary itself is good or if it is just the subject matter that is so compelling. It is about "The Paper Clip Project" that was done at Whitwell Middle School in Whitwell, TN. As part of a study on the Holocaust the eigth grade students decided to collect paper clips for each of the 6 million people murdered. They chose paper clips for their symbol because paper clips were invented by Norwegians and Norwegians wore them on their lapels as a silent protest against Nazi occupation in WWII. To date approximately 30 million paperclips have been sent to Whitwell Middle School.

From their website:

The paper clip collection has become a part of the "Children's Holocaust Memorial" created by the students, staff, and community of Whitwell Middle School. The Memorial contains 11 million paper clips housed in an authentic German transport car honoring the lives of all people murdered by the Nazis. And eleven million other paper clips are contained in a monument honoring the children of Terezin. Eighteen (for chai-Hebrew for life) butterflies (the Christain symbol of renewal) enhance the grounds around the rail car. The students, staff, and community of Whitwell Middle School have transformed the car from a death car into a symbol of renewed life honoring the lives of those murdered by the Nazis. For generations of Whitwell students, a paper clip will never again be just a paper clip. Instead, the paper clip is a reminder of the importance of perseverance, empathy, tolerance, and understanding.

In addition to collecting paper clips they also received thousand of letters and at one point several Holocaust survivors came to the town to tell their stories. The whole thing is very, very moving and I highly recommend it.

Thanksgiving blues

I know it is probably un-American of me, but I really hate Thanksgiving. The fact that it is rapidly approaching is depressing me. I have had so many awful Thanksgivings that I couldn't even begin to explain, but it truly is a day that I dread. I don't like turkey, I don't like cranberry sauce, I don't like sweet potatoes and I especially don't like that green bean casserole made with the Chinese noodles that everyone else seems to love, but that isn't even the half of it. My fantasy is to someday spend Thanksgiving day drinking many colorful drinks on a beach somewhere they have never heard of Thanksgiving. A girl can dream...

Food in NYC

How come all the food is so much better in New York City? It just isn't fair that we can't get anything remotely as good out here in the 'burbs. We took a spontaneous trip into the city yesterday to get out and enjoy what was probably the last of the nice weather. Did a little furniture shopping and then after a stop at the playground at Union Square park we stopped at City Bakery for a snack before heading home and we had delicious cookies and muffins. Maybe it was the day and maybe it was the best chocolate chip cookie I ever had. I can't be sure. We then took Chinese food home from my favorite place, Sammy's Noodle Shop and went home and pigged out some more. A good time was had by all.

The tables have been turned

The tables have been turned on me this week. Tuesday afternoon as I was changing back into my work clothes in the gym locker room I realized that my shoes had completely come apart at one of the seams. My toes were hanging out and it looked ridiculous. My first thought was to go up the road and buy a new pair of shoes, but since I am trying hard to curtail my spending I decided to just put my gym sneakers back on and anyone who didn't like it could go...

I really liked this particular pair of wedge heel suede loafers and they weren't very old and I hadn't worn them that many times so I was feeling a bit disappointed about them falling apart. When I got home from work I promptly threw them both in the trash. In the kitchen trash can.

Later on that night I told my husband what happened because he had been with me when I bought those shoes. And then he floored me when he said "Want me to drop them off at a shoemaker for you?"

Honestly, this never occurred to me. "No, they're ruined," I said.

"I'm sure they can be repaired." Husband said.

"I already threw them in the garbage." And he didn't even laugh at me when he offered to get them out of the trash for me. I told him not to bother. He let it go at that, but I am still amazed that for a change he was the voice of reason where as my behavior was utterly ridiculous. Wonders never cease.

Why do the women have to grind the corn?

Today I spent the day with one of my oldest friends. We figured out that we have known each other for about 23 years now -- since 6th grade where we first bonded in feminism in Mr. Corica's Social Studies class. We both got in trouble for demanding to know why only the Mexican women grind the corn and never the men. Apparently Mr. Corica did not have a sufficient answer for us and we were likely relentless about it. I can't remember what that note home said, but I think it was something about us being disruptive in class. Talk about inhibiting young minds! Poor Mr. Corica. He was probably very glad to get us out of his class.

It's funny to think that this friend has known me through so much from a mutual love of Garfield to losing our virginity to college to marriage and now parenthood. She is about to become a mommy for the first time very soon so we will share that too. We both have changed so much over the years and yet in my minds eye she is the same in looks and everything else.

Good Night, and Good Luck

There was a time when I thought of George Clooney as just a pretty face who desperately wanted to be perceived as more than that. Turns out he is more than that. A lot more. He's one smart (and talented) cookie.

Yes, in case you haven't guessed by now, I saw George Clooney's film, Good Night, and Good Luck this weekend. It was gripping from start to finish. And even though I already knew the story going in and how it all worked out in the end I found myself tensing up in parts. Don't get me wrong, it wasn't a perfect movie. Some of the side stories and the supporting cast were a little thin and underdeveloped. And I have to admit I couldn't look at Robert Downey Jr. and not think "drug addict." But overall, it was really excellent. For sure there will Oscar nominations.

Honestly, I never would have guessed that George Clooney could direct and write let alone act as well as he did. I look forward to more from him.

Fancy meeting you here...

at the gym.

For the last few weeks I have been going to the gym a few mornings a week instead of just at lunch time. Up until today I haven't seen anyone I know. This morning at 6:30am (while looking my best I am sure) I ran into a colleague, Zoë's pediatrician, and a neighbor. Needless to say, I felt slightly more conspicuous than I usually do at the gym.

Let's hope that was a rare occurrence.

Men going to the movies

Husband and male co-worker friends wanted to see that Keira Knightly vehicle, Domino. Yes, I know Keira Knightly was the main reason they wanted to see it. She is undeniably hot. So, hot chick plus guns equals movie my man must see. Starship Troopers anyone???

Anyway, tonight was the night they planned to see the movie. They showed up at the movie theater at what they thought was the appropriate time only to realize the movie was not playing at that theater. Not only wasn't it playing at that theater, it wasn't playing at any theater.

My theory is that one of the guys checked the movie listings about 3 weeks ago and never checked again. Oops.

Husband and friends had to settle for burgers and beer. That would have been my preference anyway.

Candy overload

How many pieces of Halloween candy can you eat in one day? I think I am going for a record today. Seems like everyone at work brought in their extra candy today and I just cannot resist. Especially when I am at my desk all day making schedules in MS Project and filling out my own performance appraisal. Ugh. I can feel the break out coming on from all the chocolate! I for sure will be hitting the gym tomorrow and the next day and the next and the...

Truth be told: it is totally worth it. I love candy. I only go to the gym to support my candy habit anyway.

Halloween

All-in-all I would say we had a very happy Halloween. Zoë dressed up as a witch. It wasn't the costume I would have chosen, but it was what she wanted and she was quite happy about it. Plus she looked quite cute.




Of course we went out trick-or-treating and Zoë made sure to tell everyone that she was just wearing a costume. She would lift off her witch hat and say, "It's just me, Zoë I'm wearing a costume."